10 things women who get cheated on have in common

If your man is a philanderer, it’s probably not your fault. But if you’ve gotten hurt by a player more than once-or you know someone who has-you’ll want to check out what top relationship experts say could be part of the reason.

1. You were “cheated on” by your father. 
If your dad abandoned the family, was abusive, or didn’t pay much attention to you, it often triggers a cycle, notes Jeanette Raymond, PhD., a licensed psychologist in Los Angeles, CA. “You expect the same from every man.” Dr. Raymond recalls one couple who was happy until he was socializing more with his co-workers. She grew very possessive, and started checking his phone. Even when he was out with his brother, she assumed he was cheating. “She felt as if he didn’t care about her, just like her father,” says Dr. Raymond. Her partner eventually did cheat on her, he admitted, to make her back off. Women stuck in this cycle need to mourn the loss of what didn’t happen as a child and let it go. “Try looking at the facts, not just your feelings,” suggests Dr. Raymond.”
2. You mistake attraction for love. 
Attraction just happens. Love is something that builds over time and takes work. Sure, attraction can lead to love. But not always. “Female-to-male attraction works the same whether you’re 16, 36 or 56,” says Scot Conway, PhD, relationship coach and author of Emotional Genius. “A top attractive quality in a man is when he doesn’t need your approval.” Men who don’t need a commitment tend to have extreme self-confidence. “If you understand that attraction is one thing and love is something else, and the first doesn’t always lead to the second, you have a massive advantage,” says Dr. Conway.
3. You’re attracted to the “wrong” guys. 

Women who get burned again and again are overlooking the good guys. “The classic friend zone is where many of the best partners end up,” explains Dr. Conway. Why? Nice men can try too hard to impress you, which can be a turn-off. Sometimes what women want “is a bad guy they can change,” explains Dr. Raymond. So have a two-date rule: Give a guy a fair shake before you dismiss him. How do you know you’ve found a man who could really be there for you? “You can tell him anything without feeling embarrassed or that you’ll scare him off,” shares Dr. Raymond. “And he accepts you the way you are.”
4. You’re not really into sex anymore. 
No getting around it: sex is really important to men. If you’re just “going through the motions” and having sex you’re not enjoying, he might feel rejected and consider cheating. “Think of outings when he clearly doesn’t want to be there. After a while, you’d just as soon not go out. It’s the same with sex,” explains Dr. Conway. Try talking to him and telling him what you like and what feels good. “If you are not there to fulfil the needs of your partner, those needs don’t just go away. If it is something you don’t want someone else there for, you be there.”
5. You’re your worst critic. 
If you’re insecure about your body and often complain about it, he will start to see you through your eyes. Many of us do this more than we realize. “Do these jeans make me look fat? Do you think I’m gaining weight? I hate my cellulite. My boobs are getting droopy…You’ve got to stop!” says Laurel House, relationship expert and founder of ScrewingTheRules.com. “Let your guy view you as the gorgeous gem that you are. Act confidently. Embrace your body regardless of its shape and age.”
6. You give up your independence. 
“Some women give themselves so completely to the relationship that their partners feel uncomfortable and ‘bought’,” observes Dr. Raymond. And the irony is that in trying so hard to bolster the relationship, you become less like the woman he was originally attracted to. If you lose yourself in a man-canceling plans to be with him, only listening to the music he likes, posting only pictures of the two of you on Facebook-the man can feel trapped. And when one feels trapped, the instinct is to get free. “And they do that by cheating, because it’s an easy way out,” explains Dr. Raymond.
7. You believe sweet talkers are sweet guys. 
Women who don’t trust their gut when there are warning signs, are more apt to be cheated on. “I have a patient who is involved with a total jerk. But he wrote her a long letter, which she looked at as ‘his putting into words what he couldn’t say in person,’” says Jane Greer, PhD, New York-based relationship expert and author of How Could You Do This to Me? Learning to Trust After Betrayal. Women who are easy marks for cheaters tend to be moved by showy displays of affection. The guys quickly figure out that “those will suffice to keep them connected and take her attention away from what’s actually going on,” notes Dr. Greer. “Rather than taking him at his word, go by his behaviour, because often that’s the real him,” she suggests.
8. You’re a Workaholic. 
If you’re working extremely long hours, or are unavailable, he’ll feel neglected, says Dr. Greer. If the circumstances can’t be avoided, compensate during your downtime. Even if you only have one day a week free, use that day to prioritize your relationship. Make every Saturday night, say, a non-negotiable date to snuggle on the couch with a movie. Talking openly and frequently about when you might need to be unavailable and how long you expect it to go on is essential. If you don’t, over time, he may act on the “abandonment” by cheating.
9. You don’t take pride in your appearance. 
We know what you’re thinking: Like he’s Jared Leto? But hear us out. Not taking care of yourself at all sends your man a message: Leave me alone, says Carole Lieberman, MD, author of Bad Girls: Why Men Love Them & How Good Girls Can Learn Their Secrets. Guys can translate your lack of interest in feeling and looking your best as lack of interest in them, a blow to their self-esteem. That same “you’re not worth it” message can be sent when boundaries disappear too. “Women who get cheated often started using the toilet, farting, and waxing their upper lip in front of him,” adds House.
10. You put the kids first. Always. 
If you never give your husband first dibs on your time, he’s going to wish he was with somebody who thought he was important. By first dibs, we mean, sticking to date night plans even though your daughter was just invited to a sleep-over, needs a ride and is having an “all my pajamas are ugly!” meltdown. “An assumption among women who are cheated on is that their relationship can wait until the kids are older and things ‘get easier,’” notes Antoniette Coleman, Psychotherapist/Relationship Coach in McLean, VA. It can’t. “Break this cycle by learning to be ‘a good enough mom,’” urges Coleman. “Send store-bought cupcakes to the bake sale, volunteer at school once a month instead of once a week, let the kids have downtime instead of scheduling every moment of their day. You’ll free up energy for yourself and your spouse.”

Source: Yahoo Shine

Five health-conscious habits that can improve your love life

Not many people translate healthy relationship tips in the literal sense. Rather, they assume that healthy relationship tips merely tell you how to keep you and your partner on solid terms, better able to weather through whatever storm comes your way.

But, there are actually healthy relationship tips that better your relationship, as well as your physical health. In fact, there are five main ways to add years to your life and life to your love:
#1. Ditching the Cig
The first of the healthy relationship tips involves the cigarette: Put it out. Stomp on it, smash it, rip it up into a dozen pieces — do whatever you need to to assure your addiction has gone up in smoke. When it comes to health, the reason for this is obvious: Smoking causes heart disease, respiratory problems and all kinds of cancer. But, it doesn’t only minimize your well-being, it keeps your love life from igniting as well.
A survey by the dating app Hinge attests to this, as online profiles of smokers are rejected a whopping 89 percent of the time. This makes them 61 percent more likely to be rejected than their non-smoking counterparts.
#2. Adopt a Pet 
Guys may think girls go for men with the nicest car, the biggest houses or the fattest wallets, but they really go for guys with the cutest pet. Still, where you get your pet can play a role in how women view you.
A survery by PetSmart found that 59 percent of singles said dates are more attractive when they adopt a pet rather than merely buy one. The survey also found that 35 percent of single women have been more attracted to someone because of their pet and 70 percent agreed that how a date treats their pet is highly important.

Adopting a pet also brings good news to your health. On average, people with pets are believed to live seven years longer than those who don’t have canine or feline companionship. Pets have also been found to lower blood pressure and stress in humans and make them more active. The latter is especially true for dog owners.
#3. Get Up and Get Moving
Being physically active is among the most important healthy relationship tips because getting up and getting moving can actually lead to getting it on. The reason for this is rather simple: People who are active give off a sense of adventure, excitement and spontaneity, all traits that are attractive to members of the opposite sex.
It’s virtually a no-brainer how physical activity improves your health. But, for those who have been living under a rock or haven’t seen a doctor ever, physical activity has a myriad of benefits, including improving cardiac function, lowering stress, reducing blood pressure, maintaining a healthy body weight, strenghtening bones, looking younger and preventing cancer.
#4. Lose Weight if You Need To
Being a pound or two overweight might not impact your health too drastically, but being obese can reduce your lifespan, your mobility, and cause your organs to fail prematurely. It can also mess with your immune system, your coordination and your ability to perform everyday tasks. And then there’s what it does to your love life.
Sometimes, being obese minimzes your dating prospects because people are about as shallow as a kiddie pool. But the real damage from obesity comes from how it makes you feel about yourself. It drastically reduces your level of confidence, forcing your ego to tell you that you just don’t have game. Once your ego takes this stand, your dating life does indeed become DOA.
#5. Don’t Over-Tan
There is a big difference in going out in the sun to get a little color and getting so much color that you look like an Oompa Loompa. Over-tanning simply makes you look unattractive, older than your years. and rather leathery — qualities not a ton of people are looking for.
On the health front, tanning leads to skin cancer, which isn’t usually a big deal unless it’s melanoma. Then it turns from being no big deal into a life-threatening one. Make the right decision and skip excessive tanning. Oh, and don’t forget your sunscreen!

Source: Magazine.foxnews.com

Why you should delay sex if you want a real relationship

Sex is tempting, but is it a good idea?

Premature sex creates an imaginary bond that isn’t strong enough to sustain a long-term relationship
A promising relationship can be derailed when people have premature sex before getting to know each other and learning if they are truly compatible. Premature sex rushes things and creates an imaginary bond that isn’t strong enough to sustain a long-term relationship.
Premature Sex = Lust
Having sex early on gives a man very little incentive to get to know who you are. When a man doesn’t know who you are, the sex he has with you is based on lust (i.e. physical gratification), instead of a real like or love (i.e. deep emotional connection).
A woman tends to feel an emotional connection after having sex, even when she doesn’t really know who the man is. If the sex is amazing, oxytocin will trick you into thinking you’re compatible, even if he isn’t the right man for you. You’ll tend to fall for him soon after based on the illusion of who you think he is. As you continue to have sex, your feelings become stronger and you feel more connected to him. You may even think you love him, when you actually lust for him.
Easy Come, Easy Go

Sexual encounters that are premature lead to short-term or on-again, off-again relationships that are about hanging out and hooking up. A man who sleeps with a woman who is quick to sleep with him, doesn’t think of this woman as someone to settle down with. His perception of an “easy woman” is easy come, easy go. She’s fine to sleep with, but isn’t marriage material.
If you find yourself having sex with a man early on, even if you tell him you don’t usually sleep with a man so soon, he won’t believe you because your actions show otherwise.
Take a Hiatus from Sex
If you want a real relationship with a man you really like and have been sleeping with him early on, stop having sex to see if you are both compatible. Taking a hiatus from sex will also show you if he is interested in the real you or just wants you for sex. A man who is only looking for sex will have no interest in getting to know you and will soon leave. While this may initially be hurtful, it’s best to know sooner than later.
A man who wants a genuine relationship will respect your wishes of taking a hiatus from sex until you get to know each other. He may not be happy about it, but he will deal with it. Learn what’s most important to him, what his values are, what his family is like, how he treats others, what he thinks about different topics, how he views the world, etc. Let him get to know you too.
Taking the time to learn about each other will reveal how compatible you are outside of the bedroom. If you’re both connected on a mind, body and soul level, this increases the possibility for your connection to turn into a lasting relationship.
The Bottom Line
If you want to be in a long-term relationship, delay sex until you both feel a connection on a mind, body and soul level. In doing so, you are knowing your worth by placing a higher value on yourself. As a result, you’ll attract a higher quality man who treats you with the love and respect you deserve.

Source: Yourtango.com

4 signs you are not meant to be together

The concept of soul mates- two people sharing a deep and special connection- is one reality that most people crave for, but it’s however nothing more than a pipe-dream.

While the existence of the concept has been challenged, there is one whose validity remains beyond doubt- incompatible mates.
Since most of us are always confronted with the hurdle of choosing the right partner, here are four signs that you’ll know you and that partner of yours aren’t just meant to be together.
You and your partner find faults in each other
There is nothing more annoying than having a partner who is an obsessed perfectionist. Anything you do hardly seem right or perfect. Worse still, both of you constantly point out each other’s faults like a compensation would be given for the competition.
Pointing one another’s faults is good, it becomes bad when it constantly leads to misunderstanding.

You and your partner hardly see each other
If there are more excuses not seeing each than there are seeing each other, any more time spent in such relationship is a mere waste of time. You will fare well passing time playing badminton or something.
When you hardly miss each other or feel reluctant calling or message your partner, then waking up and walking away from that misadventure called a relationship would be the best decision you’d ever make.
If you both don’t mind being apart or you enjoy spending time with other people than your significant other, then it’s a sign that going further in such relationship is a disaster waiting to happen.
You avoid each other in public places
Except you have a phobia for public places or you both are running a reality show, avoiding each other in public places is a dangerous sign that such relationship isn’t heading anywhere.
If your partner isn’t proud to display you in public view or rarely liked to be seen with you and hides from you like you are carrying a leprosy, it could only mean two things- you are being used or (s)he is is hoping to meet someone else.
You and your partner have disagreements more often than not
If the amount of time you spend disagreeing is more than what you spend you enjoying the relationship, then your true Mr(s) right still needs to be located. If both of you have an extremely hard time tolerating (including that body odour that could wake the dead) and forgiving each other, then no prayer can solve your incompatibilty.
Worse still, if both of you scream at each other like you are senior members of Nigerian supporters club, then there is nothing more beneficial than parting ways.

Source: Informationng

What it really means if you’re dreaming about an ex

If you’re struggling to shake an ex out of your subconscious, you’re not alone. In fact, people are more likely to dream about an ex than their current partner, according to a recent survey by the online dream resource DreamsCloud.

The site surveyed 1,172 men and women about what goes through their mind mid-sleep. Interestingly, they found that 29 percent of people dreamt about past loves while only 25 percent fantasized about their current partners.
And get this: Less than one in five people would tell their partners if they dreamt about cheating on them. We’re guessing these people don’t talk in their sleep or they would definitely have some explaining to do.
But is a blast from the past haunting your dreams really a bad omen? “In general, having sexual feelings or dreams about other people is normal,” says licensed counselor and relationship therapist Anne McKay. “It doesn’t necessarily mean you want to cheat on your partner, it just means you’re comfortable having feelings for other people.”
That said, there’s a chance that exes appearing in your dreams could mean you still have some lingering feelings—positive or negative—toward them that you need to resolve, says relationship expert Terri Orbuch, Ph.D. But even if these dreams are becoming excessive, it still doesn’t mean that your current relationship is doomed.
“If you are in a fulfilling relationship, then frequently dreaming about an ex shouldn’t be a threat,” says McKay.

Instead, she says, it could mean that you might need some closure with the ex or you might be feeling guilty about the way things ended. Orbuch says dreams attempt to work out what you haven’t let go of, which could be why your ex keeps popping up while you’re asleep.
Finally, it could also be an indication that your current relationship isn’t meeting all of your needs, says McKay. So how can you tell what’s going on? Your best bet is assessing how happy you are with your partner in all aspects of your relationship—you know, while you’re awake, says McKay.
If everything’s great in your bond and you had a random dream about one hot night with your ex, it’s probably nothing. The bottom line: If you really want to know why you’re dreaming about an ex, you may have to look at what’s going on in your relationships with your eyes open.
So about keeping these dreams from your partner—should you stay quiet or spill the details? Orbuch says she wouldn’t recommend telling a partner unless there are major problems, like you’re actually thinking of cheating or the dreams remind you of flaws in your current relationship. In that case, you should take to your partner about the root of the problem, not necessarily the dream itself.
If you do want to bring it up, you might want to also consider how new the relationship is, says McKay. “If you’re in the initial stages of dating, it’s probably not a great idea to share because you’re not secure enough in your relationship.” (Plus, can you really blame your brain for still occasionally dreaming of your long-term ex when you first start dating someone new?)
But if you’re in a stable, healthy relationship where you feel comfortable enough to talk about it and don’t think it’ll lead to any irrational jealousy, feel free to broach the topic.
Because chances are, hooking up with an ex—like accidentally going into work naked—is something that you really don’twant to do outside your dreams.

Source: Womenshealthmag.com

7 incredible benefits of cuddling

Cuddling after sex for at least 15 minutes has lots of positive effects on your body & relationship.

We are natural-born cuddlers. From the moment we’re placed in our mother’s arms and realize that snuggled up all warm and cozy next to someone we love is the most perfect place one can be, we’re basically in it to win it.
There’s nothing quite like being wrapped in the arms of someone about whom you care endlessly.
In addition to cuddling feeling completely awesome, it also has a whole bunch of health benefits, too. Studies have found that engaging in cuddling after sex for at least 15 minutes has a whole boatload of positive effects on your body and relationship.
If you have the time to extend that 15 minutes into an extra 20 or 30, then all that great stuff just gets even better. It’s the couple that cuddles together that stays together.
Here are the seven benefits of staying locked in one another’s arms longer than usual.
1. It’s Great For Your Sex Life

According to research out of the University of Toronto Mississauga, those who make cuddling a mandatory ending to sex, report “higher levels of satisfaction with their sex lives.” It’s not just because there’s sex going on, but because taking the time for intimacy after the act reaffirms the emotional and sexual bond there.
2. It Makes For A Happier Relationship
All that cuddling releases oxytocin, which is basically your “good time” hormone. Not only does the hormone run rampant during cuddle sessions, but, “it increases overall happiness,” says psychologist, Elizabeth Lombardo. Not to mention, the intimacy that comes with cuddling is important to the health and happiness of every relationship.
3. It Helps Relieve Pain
Sometimes, with just a touch, things are better. Think about when you were younger — whenever anything hurt, your immediate response was to call for Mom, because her touch was a magical cure-all. While nothing can outdo a mother’s touch, the oxytocin released during cuddling can actually ease pain in individuals. It’s a perfect combination of hormones and cuddles that can make a physical (or even emotional) ache bearable.
4. It Boosts Affection
The intimacy that comes with cuddling, especially after sex, cannot be rivaled by pretty much anything in the world. Not only does cuddling make for better affection, but it also allows us to communicate our affections without words, when words sometimes fail us.
According to David Klow, a marriage and family therapist in Chicago, “Most people want to feel understood, and communication is the vehicle by which they transmit understanding and empathy. Non-verbal communication can be a very powerful way to say to your partner, ‘I get you.’ Cuddling is a way of saying, ‘I know how you feel.’ It allows us to feel known by our partner in ways that words can’t convey.” So, you know, give your partner a squeeze, a nice long squeeze.
5. It’s Good For Your Immune System
What do we have to thank again for this one? Oxytocin. Without all that feel good action going on, the even greater outer effect of it all is a stronger immune system. You see, happy people don’t get sick; they just don’t. If you’re sick, it’s because you’re not cuddling enough. It’s science, people.
6. It Lowers The Risk Of Heart Disease
When I say it lowers heart disease, I’m also lumping in all the other factors that contribute to heart disease (high blood pressure, stress, anxiety), and saying it lowers them, too. The physical effects that a daily cuddle can have on your heart are amazing. As Holistic Health Counselor, Jodi Geigle,says, “when it comes to health, cuddling is pretty much the new half marathon!” But, in this writer’s humble opinion, it’s even better because you don’t have to leave the bed.
7. It Can Lead To Round 2
Although you may have just come off of some mind-blowing sex, the dopamine that’s being released during your cuddle session, according to ob-gyn Dr. Renee Horowitz, just increases that sexual desire again and again. You may need a rest, but keeping things close instead of jumping out of bed right after, is just asking for another round of the good stuff. And, as we learned, that good stuff is really good for every inch of you.
Source: Yourtango.com

How to handle an abusive spouse

Anger is the emotional energy within each of us that rises up when something needs to change. Anger needs to be talked about, but not acted out.
Acting out your anger (tantrums, yelling, violence) unless it is done in a carefully controlled therapeutic enviornment, simply reinforces the idea that anger is the same as acting out.
Those therapeutic sessions that urge people to express their anger with yelling are really intended for people who have trouble getting angry.
Anger management and abatement requires learning about your anger, what it means, what triggers it, and how to use it in a healthy way.
I teach my clients that “He who loses it, loses.” Expressing anger in an out-of-control way will ruin your relationships, cost you your job and land you in the hospital or in jail.
Instead, you need to understand how to recognize the growth of your anger before it’s too far gone to control and learn to channel it in healthy ways.

To express your anger effectively, follow these steps:
First, you must stay calm — If you raise your voice, you won’t be heard because the other person will become defensive.
If you aren’t calm, calm down before expressing your anger, count to 10, take deep breaths or talk to someone with whom you are not angry.
Figure out what you’re angry about. It’s common to be upset or angry but not know exactly what it’s all about. What are you feeling? Who are you angry at? What did he or she do? Taking the time to get clear about your anger will make it easier for you to be clear with your partner and easier for your partner to figure out what to do. If your partner did something wrong, just blaming still doesn’t make it clear exactly how you were hurt, or what the other person can do to make it right.
Know what will appease your anger. It is your responsibility to know what the other person can do to be forgive.
Understand if you’ll be doing any damage, to yourself or others, by expressing your anger. It’s usually not smart to tell your boss, a policeman, your mother-in-law or other people with power that you’re angry. It’s better to offer a solution in those cases. Also, when someone is deep in grief, or recovering from an illness or big problem like being fired, it is not a good time to talk about your anger. Doing so makes you look uncaring and narcissistic.
Only after these steps should you directly tell the person that you are angry (“I’m angry, and I need to talk with you about it”). Then explain what you need to fix the problem (“I need you to never hurt me like that again;” “I need you to pick up your mess;” “I am not willing to be friends with you if you gossip about me.”)If you’ve followed the steps, you will almost always get a positive response to your anger such as an apology and a promise to change behavior.
If you can’t calm down enough to do this, you may have an anger problem and need therapy or anger management classes.

Source: Yourtango.com

How to please your man without sex

Ask a handful of guys about what makes them feel close in a relationship and they’ll immediately point to sexual intimacy. But sex is not the whole picture.

All men have a variety of needs within a relationship beyond sex.There are a few generalisations about men you can consider when you’re trying to make your man happy.
But beyond that, you have to figure out what makes him tick as an individual. Pleasing your man outside the bedroom may require a little creativity.
• Space and Freedom: “Men are like rubber bands,” says John Gray, author of Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus. It may seem like he unexpectedly pulls away, especially when you have just started to feel close.
Most men have a strong need for autonomy and independence and don’t want to be smothered. Sometimes, a significant other can feel slighted.
If your man seems to be pulling away, show him love by letting go. Give him the space and freedom he craves. You’ll only push him further away if you cling to him.

• Respect and Admiration: One of the top needs for most men in a relationship is the need to feel respected and admired. You can communicate this respect through words and actions.
Sometimes, all it takes is a gentle squeeze of the hand and a verbal affirmation to let him know that you’re in his corner.
On the other hand, you can inflict some serious damage to his ego and the relationship with harsh criticism, flippancy or nagging.
• Love and Forgiveness: If you’ve got a laundry list of all of your man’s faults or the ways he’s hurt you, toss it out. By building a case against him, you’re stacking up reasons for him to leave.
After all, ongoing guilt is a load most men don’t want to carry. Men make mistakes, and many of those mistakes might seem stupid. Let them go and make him feel accepted through your forgiveness.
• The Honest Truth: Most men hate the games you’ll find in many relationships: half-truths, manipulation and underhanded passive-aggressiveness. They just want it straight, so speak what’s on your mind.
Many of them are terrible mind readers and will never figure out what you’re thinking. The less you’re hiding and the more clearly you’re communicating about your expectations, the more secure and less frustrated he’ll feel in the relationship.
• What He Likes: Take the time to figure out what is important to your man on a personal level. According to Dr. Gary Chapman, author of The Five Love Languages, men have one or two “love languages” that speak to them: words of affirmation, quality time, physical touch (which doesn’t have to be sex), gifts or acts of service.
Dr. Willard F. Harley, Jr., author of His Needs, Her Needs, explains that each person in a relationship has a specific set of emotional needs that his or her partner either is or isn’t meeting. A couple of needs common to men include recreational companionship and physical affection.
If you’re unsure of what speaks to your man, do some research and ask him questions. You won’t regret getting to know him a little better and you’ll find out what really gets him going.

Source: Gina Poirier

Some fathers are different and so sweet. Celebrating fatherhood

Celebrating fatherhood: Show of mixed feelings

Today is Fathers Day but in Ghana, the event comes without the hype and numerous enthusiastic activities that marked the celebration of Mothers Day a month ago on May 8.
Various reasons have been assigned to the seeming lack of interest in the event, with many people saying that they are unaware of the event while others say they just don’t have any interest in the celebration.

Fatherhood comes with responsibility
Fathers are considered the backbone of the family unit and it is worth celebrating their contributions to the maintenance of the family.
In the Ghanaian and African cultural setting, men can be termed and considered as fathers once they live a responsible life worthy of emulation.
This is, however, always not the case because while some fathers toil and sacrifice the luxury of life for the growth and development of their children, others do not even know the whereabouts of their children, not to talk of taking care of them.

“Sperm donors”
“If a man bears a child with a woman and fails to cater for the needs of the child, then he cannot be called a father but a sperm donor and that is what my father is”.
These were the words of 24-year-old Fredrick Osei who has not seen his father for the past 20 years since he left home.
“My mother has taken me through primary to university education, and currently I am planning to pursue a law degree at the University of Ghana Faculty of Law, and my mother is ready to sell her plots of land to help me if I get admission.”
For 26-year-old Ms Clara Afi, her father told her that he could not waste his money on educating his children, especially the girls, so he neither sent her to school nor helped her in any way to make a living for herself.
“My mother sold everything she had to make sure that my siblings and myself learnt some form of vocation,” she said.
The story of Mr Bobby Narh, a mechanic, is not different, as according to him, his father did not accept him at birth.
“My father did not even accept me as his child when I was born. He rejected me and never took up the responsibility of taking care of me” Mr Narh lamented.
Making the difference 
Nonetheless, some fathers have made a difference in the lives of their families and have exhibited exceptional qualities of fatherhood. Some have sacrificed the luxury and pleasures of buying flashy cars, houses and material things for the sake of their children.
“My wife died three months ago and it has not been easy combining work and taking care of my two sons who are between the ages of  seven and 10”
“I have to wake up as early as 3:00 a.m. everyday so that I can get them ready for school before I leave for the office. I have been doing this for the past six years since my wife got sick and died recently,” says Mr Adjei Larbi, a public relations practitioner.
Mariama Ampofo, a university graduate, said “I grew up knowing one man in my life and that was my father. Although I was recently told he was not my real father, I still hold him in high esteem as my father because he has always treated me with fatherly love, tenderness and care”.
“Even when he does not have money, he will make sure that he provides you with whatever you need. He spends all his monies on our education and deprives himself of the luxury car he can easily buy,” Sarah Amankwah, a student said.
Fathers impact on children
According to the Child Welfare Information Gateway website, children who have their fathers close to them are likely to be emotionally secured, confident to explore their surroundings, and, as they grow older, have better social connections with peers.  It said the way fathers played with their children also impacted on a child’s emotional and social development. Fathers spend a much higher percentage of their one-on-one interaction with infants and pre-school children, in stimulating playful activity than mothers.
The Children’s Act, 1998 (Act 560), section 47 states that “a parent or any person who is legally liable to maintain a child or contribute towards the maintenance of the child is under a duty to supply the necessaries of health, life, education and reasonable shelter for the child”.
Fathers’ care and love are irreplaceable in the heart of their children, therefore, irresponsible fathers should reform their ways and ensure that they take responsibility of the children they bring to the world.

Source: Graphic Online

What women really think …when you’re still friends with your ex

A testament to how great he is? Or is “just friends” actually code for “we’re still banging?”
The best part about our exes is that without them we wouldn’t be the people we are today, which, of course, can also be the worst thing about them, too.
Whether or not we like it, our exes, although our past, can still be a very present part of our lives, even if we haven’t talked to them in years. We may be through with the past, as they say, but it doesn’t mean the past is through with us.
But for some people their ex isn’t just a ghost that haunts them, but a real live person with whom they still have a close bond and friendship. To those who can still be friends with their ex they deserve a huge “kudos!”, but what about their new partner? How do they feel when the past just won’t go away?
We asked a few women their thoughts on men who are still friends with their exes. We asked a few women their thoughts on men who are still friends with their exes. Is it a testament to how great he is? Or is the phrase “just friends” actually code for “we’re still banging?”
Out of sight, out of mind

“They might be ‘friends,’ but I don’t really feel like being in the same room as someone who has also seen my significant other nekkid and isn’t his mom. Probably not code for ‘still doing it,’ but it’s unnecessary. I will throw in an exception for high school group of friends, because some groups passed each other around like a game of hot potato,” says Nicole, 33.
“I’m still friends with one of my exes, but he’s an ex from college and there are no feelings there at all. My boyfriend has never met him and has zero interest in doing so, because he feels he might get jealous. I guess I’d feel the same way if my boyfriend were still friends with his exes — as long as I don’t have to witness the private jokes and intimacy that’s still there, it’s OK. But he doesn’t keep in touch with any of his exes, so I don’t have to worry about it thank god,” Jennie, 29.
It’s all about trust, and lots of it
“I never hang with my ex so it’s hard to imagine… but how I feel about it depends on the relationship I have with the guy. If I have a solid one then I will be comfortable having my boyfriend staying close friends with exes. I would basically put my whole trust in the guy I am with, it’s just easier on my mind that way, and I am sure is better for the relationship,” says Mieko, 35.
“I don’t know. I’d like to think that my trust wouldn’t be broken, but past relationships have taught me that trust is a hard thing to NOT have broken. It would depend on the relationship and our level of mutual trust and respect,” says Courtney, 27.
I do it, so it’s cool if he does it, too… to a degree, of course
“I still meet up with exes on occasion, so I wouldn’t mind if they do. There’s always a line where it turns from being friendly and keeping in touch, to rekindling,” says Autumn, 25.
“I’m friends with all my exes, but maybe it’s because I never loved them? Anyway, I’m fine with the guy still hanging out with his ex as long as he has the relationship I have with mine,” says Natalie, 26.
No way
“Based on experience, men and women can’t REALLY be friends if they have a sexual history, so no f**king way. I wouldn’t tolerate it,” says Patricia, 33.
So, what about you? Are you down with your partner hanging out with their ex, or is it completely insane to put that amount of trust in someone? You have to figure that they saw something in them once, so maybe they could again? Or not. People are usually exes for a reason.
Source: Yourtango.com

The 10 dumbest mistakes men make in relationships

We all have our own unique challenges related to the way we see and interact with the world around us. The good news is that a lot of it could be avoided if more people became conscious of the huge differences in how men and women navigate the world.
As a relationship coach, I can tell you there are so many ways that otherwise good people mess up intimate relationships. Believe me — I hear them all — but most of them fit into just a few key categories. For simplicity’s sake, I want to outline some of the most common ones to help guys get their girl and keep her. And the good news is, if you see yourself in some of these examples, you can turn it around if you want to make the effort. After all, if you’re married, it sure beats losing half of your stuff, and it can very well make your life a lot more fulfilling in the long run. So here they are in no particular order:
#1. You don’t bring her presence.
No, not that kind of presents. I’m talking about a gift of another kind. I’m talking about the same qualities that make YOU feel good. You know how it feels when you’re grounded, centered and on top of your game? You’re crystal clear on who you are and what you want. You say what you mean and you mean what you say. You stand firm and you’re unwavering in the face of resistance. Sounds great, right? Well, as good as it feels to you, women who navigate by feminine energy love and crave that even more than you! It’s hot, and it literally makes the ladies swoon when you hold that space. It makes them feel safe and protected because she trusts that you have what it takes to be her rock. By the same token, every time you act indecisive, fearful, uncertain, or all over the place, it breaks that connection and makes her lose attraction, and become untrusting, and even repulsed. This is a HUGE one, guys. It literally can make you or break you.
#2. You don’t get or understand women.
Feminine energy navigates the world via emotion, so sometimes it may appear that she’s all over the place: happy one minute and raging the next. You should know that description falls far, far short of the definition of “psycho.” While that may be hard to understand when we masculine types navigate by logic and making sense, just trust me when I tell you that you’d do the same if you had her body chemistry.
When you understand that her emotions aren’t irritating interruptions to your boring status quo, but instead a welcome diversion that actually livens up your world and brings you the best things in life like passion, fun and excitement, you’ll see she actually makes your world better every single day. Face it — left to your own devices, you’d probably work too much and have a lot less to look forward to on a regular basis.
The masculine experience is kind of like a coloring book drawing: clear, simple and with bold outlines that are fine standing alone on their own. However, they are totally lacking in tone, depth, dimension and color of any kind. But then the feminine energy brings all the colors of the rainbow to it and it becomes brighter, more vibrant and even radiant. Sure, every now and then, the darker colors come out and they may even color outside the lines, but it does make life more interesting. Approach it this way and you’ll have a whole new appreciation for all the gifts your lady can bring to your world.

#3. You might actually be scared of her or intimidated by her.
I hate to even bring this one up, but some of you know it’s true so let’s just get it out of the way. Guys tend to want to be in control and the truth of the matter is, feminine energy is all about flow. Men can’t really hold back the “flow” of the tides, and feminine energy can’t effectively be controlled long-term, either. Tougher guys than you have tried to control it but it doesn’t work. A smart man knows how to channel that energy instead. Sometimes it’s like a storm. It can be a perfectly beautiful day, and the next thing you know, the clouds appear, the skies get dark and all hell breaks loose. Rather than controlling it, you ride it out, respect it, and know it’s all part of the cycle of life. There’s no sunshine without rain; no happiness without grief; no black without white. The good news is that on the other side of the storm, the sun comes back out, and life is beautiful again.
#4. You made something (or someone) else more important than her.
Feminine energy responds to adoration and praise. She needs your attention and the presence we already talked about. A compliment and your conscious focus will light her up from the inside and you will get to bask in the glow of her beautiful feminine radiance. On the other hand, because masculine energy tends to be single-focused, targeted, and an inseparable part of who you are as a man, you will, on occasion, ignore her, overlook her, and maybe even take her for granted while your attention is elsewhere. This is to be expected, especially when it comes to work and providing for her. But just know that like all things, it has to be balanced. Remember: Any time you fail to make her feel special and put something or someone else ahead of her for an extended time, trouble is on the horizon. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.
#5. You’re oblivious to her feelings.
Now that you know feminine energy navigates the world via emotion, you’ll need to learn to become consciously aware of how that works or you will struggle in relationships with women. Those are your choices, so choose carefully. I hate to see someone lose half their stuff in order to get that lesson, so believe me, it pays to get outside of your own self-absorbed viewpoint and be cognizant of how your partner is feeling.
Do you remember that “single-focused” aspect to men that we already discussed? Especially when it comes to work? That’s where a lot of the trouble starts in this area, but it is a learned skill. By the way, notice I didn’t say you had to “fix” her emotions. They don’t need to be fixed — even though we all think we need to fix problems. You just have to notice them, acknowledge them, and ride them out with her while you support her. That’s not so hard, right?
#6. You either didn’t build trust, or you broke it.
This is an area where men struggle quite a bit due to several factors. We’re logical while they’re emotional so we tend to be way less committed, especially early on. By the same token, feminine energy tends to think she’s in a “relationship” far sooner than men because she processes emotionally. That combination of logic and lack of early commitment often leads to men looking at other options rather quickly. Whatever mitigating factors may exist, the fact remains that trust is critical for a great relationship. Once it’s compromised or even threatened, it is difficult for two parties to regain it. So whenever possible, I urge you to proceed in this area with caution.
#7. You’re too wishy-washy and made her feel unsafe.
This is the flip side of the presence I talked about in item number one. As intoxicating as a strong, present man can be, a wishy-washy guy who’s all over the place can be positively repulsive. It’s a huge turn-off and for good reason. Feminine energy’s number one need at all costs is to feel “safe.” She can’t feel safe at all if she’s with a spineless jellyfish of a guy that she can push around. She may ACT like she wants to call the shots herself all the time, but the truth is, it is absolutely exhausting for a feminine woman to live in her masculine energy for that long. Do both of you a favor and step up into being the kind of man she can rely on to look after what’s best for both of you. Trust me, if you do this, you’ll both thank me for it.
#8. You’re too self-absorbed.
Masculine energy is heavily predisposed and wired to pursue his mission and achieve goals. He displays his value by his ability to solve problems and fix things. As a result, oftentimes, his needs are met on the most consistent basis through his work or career. In fact, one of the biggest red flags of a relationship in trouble is a man who spends a lot of time at work — not because he may be having an affair — but simply because his needs are being met primarily in the sphere of work and not in his relationship. As I said in mistake number four, any time you put work or anything else ahead of your relationship for an extended time, trouble is on the horizon. Honestly, if you’re not willing to make the effort to manage your work/life balance, you’re essentially being unfair to both a potential partner and yourself.
#9. You don’t see the value of what she can bring to you.
Usually when someone is far more interested in work, recreational activities or maybe even hobbies, the truth is they are simply living in alignment with their deepest values. Relationships — or at least the one you may be in at that moment — simply don’t measure up to the payoff you’re getting in other areas. People will always invest their energy where they feel they get the biggest payoff. A man who is inspired and supported in his mission by his woman will find a way to have both, but it’s up to him to prove he has the bandwidth to support both. Guys, you can get all the promotions and raises you want — or land the huge deals that really get your heart pumping — but the question I have for you is this: How rewarding is it really if you don’t have someone special with whom to celebrate your victories at the end of the day?
#10. You don’t know what you want out of life or you don’t have room for her.
It’s my hope that after reading this article on the 10 mistakes men make, you’ll start to focus less on old mistakes from the past, and instead focus more on the new information I’ve shared, and how to turn it all around. If you’ve had more pain than joy from your relationships in the past, it stands to reason that you wouldn’t exactly be in a hurry to try again, but that’s just the pain and fear talking. No matter what you decide, the reality is that your knowledge, awareness and efforts are creating the life you’re leading, whether you like it or not. The truth is that we can all only get so far by ourselves. As you’ll likely hear at many weddings, the beauty of marriage or relationships in general are that you get to multiply the joy in life and divide the pain when you meet the right one for you. Whatever decision you make, I support that as the right one for you at this time.
Guys, I hope this list not only makes sense to you, but also serves as an “a ha” moment of sorts that can turn it all around for you in the area of relationships. You should know that a huge part of what I do in my mission is help women understand and work more effectively with men. The reason why is that I know the greatness that can be unleashed in a good man by a good woman who simply gets him and adores him. I know that inside the heart of every man lies the soul of a little boy who dreamed of one day being a hero. I also know that hero is alive and well inside of you right now. He’s just waiting to be fully unleashed by an amazing woman who wants, needs, and deeply desires him. If I can help you create a relationship like that, I’d be honored to serve you. Just say the word.

Source: Magazine.foxnews.com

6 Steps to being classy, sassy and single

Being single for a female often comes with a bit of fear and also a stigma. We are often treated as if there is something fundamentally wrong with us if we are single and not taken.

Relationships come and go, and single-dom is usually never a permanent state of existence for us ladies, so take your single time to love yourself, not be needy and desperate and find your own contentment.
• Now is the time: If you ever wanted to lose weight, get in shape, or get a new wardrobe then get off your couch, put your tissue down and start exercising and watching your diet. Why not?
• Happily single means loving yourself: Devote your time to your passions, dreams, and goals without distractions. It is your time…freedom! Whatever it is that you are passionate about, make it happen.
Because being single is often temporary, take advantage of this break in time and chase your dreams. This way, you will not lose them if or when you find love again.
• No more compromise: Being single, you no longer have to compromise yourself or any part of you to fit into the mold that someone else wants to create for you. You get to live your life for a time by your choices.

This allows you to create a life that is so awesome you don’t want to be rescued from it. No need for a prince now because you are a full-fledged independent classy woman all on your own.
Getting to this place is what will bring you a strong man, one that can be with you and not be intimidated.
• Happily single will lead to happily taken (if that is what you want): To be happy in your future relationship, you must first show yourself you can be happy with yourself.
You need to show yourself there is no need to be needy and desperate for a relationship because you can support yourself, pay your own bills, raise your own kids, take care of your own car and find your own sense of community, friendship and happiness.
You are sassy and can create a life where love will expand and bring to you the life of your own design.
• Alone does not mean lonely: You do not need a significant other to have a significant life. Whatever and whoever you were in your previous relationship is still who you are. You are not a diminished version of you because you no longer have a partner.
In fact, you have the opportunity now to be even more of you. Be happy, at least you didn’t lose you. Enjoy who you are and all that love you used to give out to your partner, you can now spoil yourself with it.
• Be Loving: When you can be alone and be happy, you will remember that you are beyond loveable. Be loving. Be loving to everyone and smile, because love is contagious.
You will find that your life opens when you are loving; you stand tall and you smile. Loving people are more successful; loving people are more stable and loving people are happier.
Let yourself sparkle and shine. Whatever parts of you that you had to suppress while in a relationship, you are now free to express without reservation.
Be brave, my single ladies. It is a beautiful and ever creative time in your life. It is your time. Alone time is hard to come by in life, so take advantage of it and love yourself crazy.
Spoil yourself, make your life completely decorated and designed by you. Express yourself, find and live your independent significance. It’s all about you.

Source: Graphic Online

9 things men think when they see you naked

There’s this thing guys do in the throes of hot sex, and you might not even notice. We pause, and we look.

Because when you’re totally in the moment, you put on one hell of a sexy show, and we love to watch. The thing is, visual cues are a major part of the sexual response for men. Your body has a hypnotic power over us—during sex or otherwise. Curious about what’s really running through our minds?
Here are nine things every man thinks when he sees you naked:
“Act cool.” Here’s how cartoonists interpret the male libido: Our eyes bug out, our ears turn into steam vents, and our feet flap together so fast that we temporarily levitate. It’s actually not that far fetched. When you disrobe in front of us, our heart rates spike, our blood flows south, and we slowly lose the ability to follow a train of thought. But we don’t want to give off the impression that we’ve never seen a naked woman before, so we try to keep ourselves together. While we want to howl like cartoon wolves and let our tongues roll out of our mouths, we won’t. We’ll keep it together.
“Finally, I can stare!” In the name of civilized behavior, we men do all we can to avoid being caught looking at a woman’s breasts in public. At the office, gym, and beach, we make a concerted effort to hold eye contact in conversation. But once the clothing drops off, civilized behavior is no longer a priority. We’ve now given our eyes permission to roam. Hopefully you’re okay with that.
*Mental note* We will be thinking about this moment later while we masturbate. Make no mistake about it.

“Um, I had stuff to do, didn’t I?” We could have work piling up, dinner that needs to be cooked, or a country to save, but once your underwear hits the floor, our plans pretty much just disappear.
“Wait for it…” Men have the ability to reach orgasm way faster than woman. The injustice of this isn’t lost on us. Not only does it mean we have extra to work to do, but it also means we have to delay gratification to get that work done. So rather than hurl ourselves upon you and take you like a caveman, we move at a pace that we think—or hope, at least—will get us both to the finish line at the same time.
“I really wish I knew what she wanted me to do.”  Don’t be afraid to boss us around a little bit. Our job is much easier when you give us feedback. Whisper your desires in our ear, move our hands where you want them, and take control to show us what turns you on. It all helps.
“Damn, I’m lucky.” The feeling of gratitude comes very easy in the presence of nudity.
“What on earth could she be self conscious about?” Men obviously have their insecurities too, but we still have a hard time comprehending your inhibitions when we’re so damn mesmerized by your body. We relish those moments when you’re completely self-confident and open. If you’re covering your chest, moving awkwardly, or trying to hide under a blanket, we’re going to do whatever we can to make you feel comfortable. And that’s perfectly okay, but it’s even more fun to see you happily baring what you’re working with.
*Blissful silence* In fully clothed life, we may sometimes seem preoccupied with work or like we’re too stressed to concentrate on our relationship. But nothing relieves stress like sex, and by the time you’re naked, that’s the only thing we’re thinking about. You have our undivided attention.

Source: Women’s Health

7 ways to attract a guy without using your looks

Getting attention of the guy you are interested in can be a bit tricky, especially if you don’t use your looks.

Looks are not everything and personality is much more important than looks. Although guys are highly visual creatures, most of them understand that a woman has a personality attached to her face and her body.
If you notice a nice guy, but you think you don’t look your best to get him to like you, try these seven ways to attract a guy without using your looks.
1.Don’t avoid him
If you are not around, you won’t get his attention. Don’t avoid the places where he usually spends his time. For example, if he works at a local cafe, don’t avoid that cafe, instead visit it occasionally to see him and attract him. However, don’t visit this cafe too often; otherwise you might come across as a ‘creeper’ and he might run away from you.
2.Give him attention

If you want to attract a guy without using your looks, you should give him attention. Sure, it doesn’t mean that you have to shower your crush with compliments; a few compliments will be enough to show him you are interested in him. If the guy walks past you, give him attention. If you are not brave enough to start a conversation, just make eye contact or give him a flirty, cute smile.
3.Be confident
If you start a conversation with the guy you like, try to stay confident when you chat. Although everybody knows what it feels like to be a little nervous when speaking to a person you like, men gravitate towards a woman who acts like she knows what she is doing. Your confidence can help attract the guy you like without showing your skin.
4.Be yourself
You should be yourself in every situation, especially when you are trying to attract the guy without using your looks. If you like talking about a certain celeb or about your hobby, don’t be afraid to talk about them. Don’t pretend to be someone you’re not, it won’t do any good. Always be yourself and you will definitely get his attention.
5.Be friendly
If you can’t approach the guy to chat, try talking to the people around him. If he doesn’t hear you speak, you won’t attract him without your beautiful face and body. When your crush is around, be friendly to others. He will see what a wonderful girl you are. Moreover, he might start a conversation with you and ask you on a date.
6.Laugh
I don’t mean you should laugh at everything you hear or see, but laughter is an amazing sound and it can help you attract the guy you like. Guys like to be around fun and happy women who know how to enjoy life to the fullest. If the guys sees you laugh at something interesting, he will notice how fun you are, and he can even approach you first. Your smile can impress him too.
7.Wear perfume with a delicious scent
Finally, last but not least way to attract a man without using your looks is to wear perfume with an amazing scent, which will capture his attention. If he likes this scent, he will automatically think of you each time he smells it in the future. This is one of the most effective ways to stay on man’s mind, especially when you are not around.
While your beautiful face and lean legs can attract that guy faster, your personality can do it too. If he doesn’t like your personality, move on, he is not for you. You need a man who will care about you no matter your looks. Do you know any other ways to attract a guy without using your looks?

Why cheaters cheat again and again

Monday 23rd June , 2014 10:40 am

Cheaters come up with all sorts of excuses to justify their actions of being unfaithful.
But, if your partner cheated in the past, is he or she more inclined to cheat again?
There is some truth to the saying “once a cheater, always a cheater” if the cheating is part of the person’s value system, says sex therapist and author Dr. Sari Locker.
“Some people believe they are entitled to cheat.  If committing to a serious relationship or marriage still does not change that belief, then the person’s value system will lead him or her to be unfaithful again.”
When a relationship gets rocky, cheating can also be a default mechanism for some, like drinking or shopping.
Knowing what led to past cheating can minimize the insecurities that cheating often brings. In addition, if the “why” behind the cheating hasn’t been resolved in a conscious and subconscious way, it can cause cheaters to stray again, especially if they feel their partners aren’t meeting their needs, says dating coach Marni Battista.

“Infidelity of any kind typically happens because there is an unmet need inside the relationship, so that need gets ‘outsourced’ somewhere else,” says couples counselor Jeremi McManus.
If a cheater is regretful and is actively looking at the root cause of the infidelity, a couple can have a strong relationship, says Battista.
“However, if he cheated and his actions do not match, like if he continues to stay on Facebook or communicate with someone else, he’s not honoring his commitment to the relationship.”
Communicating about each other needs and feelings, minimizes the chances of infidelity.
Says McManus: Couples who work through and acknowledge the cheating often find that there is more trust and intimacy in the relationship.  If it isn’t addressed, it is likely to linger and create distance.

Source: Magazine.foxnews.com

16 Things People Say That They Don’t Actually Mean

 When people say these things they make not necessarily mean it:
1. “It’s fine.” Literally nothing could be less fine.
2. “We should get a drink some time and catch up!” I really do want to catch up with you, but inevitably we’ll just run into each other again six months from now and make this same promise.
3. “I’m almost there!” I left my apartment one minute ago.
4. “I’m just getting one drink and then I’ll be home.” I will loudly slam everything in the kitchen when I get home at 1 a.m. and start making nachos.
5. “Your baby is sooo cute.” All new babies look the same.
6. “How was your weekend?” How long do we have to make polite small talk before I can ask if you finally hooked up with that guy from accounting?
7. “I’m not looking for something serious.” I’m not looking for something serious with you.
8. “What’s your name?” I’m not sure why I’m asking this question because I am 100 percent not going to remember your reply. Jessica? Jamie? Oh, Betty, sorry.
9. “I’m about to get on the subway/in my car. Can I call you back?” This conversation needs to end right now.
10. “I don’t think I’m going to make it out tonight. I’m not feeling well.” I feel great sitting on my couch watching Say Yes to the Dress.
11. “Do you mind if I eat the last piece?” I already ate it.
12. “No worries!” I want to murder you.
13. “I reached out but I haven’t heard back yet.” I forgot you asked me to do that until right this minute.
14. “I hate drama.” I am usually the one starting the drama.
15. Laugh at loud “lol.” I didn’t even smile.
16. “Your cat is nice.” I’m a dog person.

7 things to never tell friends about your relationship

I’m a firm believer that you should share your life with your friends and that it’s important to be able to vent to them about the things in your everyday life.

That being said, there are SOME things you should NOT tell your friends about your relationships. This is my list of the things not to tell your friends about your relationships.

1. FIGHTS

It’s okay to tell your friends about your relationship, it’s even okay to tell them when you get into a fight. But never go into the specifics unless you’re asking for an HONEST opinion. Friends that ask you to tell them if they’re being crazy about a fight that they’re having but don’t actually want to hear your opinion, are awkward people. So lets all keep our domestics to ourselves.

2. SEX

Don’t tell your friends the specifics of your sex life. Don’t tell them about any kinks your partner has because from that point on, your friend will never be able to look them in the eye again.

3. MONEY PROBLEMS

It’s okay to talk to your friends about money problems of your own but it’s not okay to bring your significant other’s finances into that conversation. A lot of people are very sensitive about what they perceive as weakness and that’s never a line you want to cross.

4. CHEATING (IF YOU’RE WORKING IT OUT)

If someone cheats on you and you dump them, feel free to tell all of your friends (and a few strangers) how much of a scumbag they are. But, if you’re working it out, NEVER tell your friends that your significant other has cheated. You may forgive them because you love them but your friends love you, and they won’t.

5. PROBLEMS IN THE BEDROOM

Once again, once you talk about this with your friends, they will never look at your partner the same way again. Your friends don’t need to know if you need to talk your significant other in for little blue pills. That’s something you should keep between you and your partner.

6. YOUR SIGNIFICANT OTHER’S PROBLEMS

Your friends are YOUR friends, and your partners problems really aren’t yours to share. Let your partner talk about their problems with whoever they choose. It’s not fair for your friends to know everything about your significant other’s life.

7. YOU SIGNIFICANT OTHER’S PAST RELATIONSHIPS

Once again, your friends are YOUR friends. They don’t need to know that four years ago the person you’re with had his heart-broken by an even woman named Tina. If that’s something they want to share with your friends, let them. But that isn’t exactly your place.

I know that we all want to believe that we live in a world like Séx and The City where we can all sit down with our girlfriends and discuss everything about everything in our lives. But, the truth is martinis and cosmos and endless conversations might be great on TV, but in real life they can get a little awkward when you see your Carrie’s Big on the street.

9 Bebated Facts About Sex.

Aspire to Acquire the desire you Admire.: Be Up-Lifted, Why we get discouraged

Aspire to Acquire the desire you Admire.: Be Up-Lifted, Why we get discouraged: Most Encouraging Poem Ever. If you want to be discouraged, Look back at your past If you want to be distracted  Look around and beside yo...

Be Up-Lifted, Why we get discouraged

Most Encouraging Poem Ever.

If you want to be discouraged,
Look back at your past
If you want to be distracted 
Look around and beside you.
If you want to be dismayed
Look down on yourself
But if you want to be delivered
Look up unto the Creator.

Real Life Scenario

Most often we look back at our past and fail to forgive ourselves.

This attitude holds us back and keeps us in the past.

Sometimes we also look at the people surrounding us,
and more often than not they discourage us and tell us "You can't do it"

And other times they make us feel so inferior with their achievements.
Then we begin to look down on ourselves and start to believe what others are saying about us. 

But my friend I want to tell you that this world is awaiting for the giant in you,

Its there, right there, hidden in you. Waiting for you to bring it out and show the whole world

What you are made off and capable off.  You are a champion too.